第六章（第7/9页）

康妮在微光中继续前行。历尽沧桑的树林散发出某种久远的忧郁，这种气息抚慰着她的心灵，至少远远好过外面世界的残酷无情。她喜欢这片残余森林的内敛，青睐古老树木的沉默寡言。它们拥有某种沉默的力量，又显示出旺盛的生命力。它们同样在等待，倔强而又坚忍地等待着，在沉默中散发出潜能。或许它们等待的只是末日的降临，被砍伐，被运走，对它们而言，森林的毁灭，对其来说就是一切的终结。但它们那坚韧而高贵的沉默，那属于强悍树木的静默，蕴含着其他的深意。

As she came out of the wood on the north side, the keeper's cottage, a rather dark, brown stone cottage, with gables and a handsome chimney, looked uninhabited, it was so silent and alone. But a thread of smoke rose from the chimney, and the little railed-in garden in the front of the house was dug and kept very tidy. The door was shut.

康妮从北端走出树林，守林人的农舍出现在眼前。这是栋深褐色的石屋，屋顶呈人字形，烟囱甚是美观。它显得那么沉静孤独，像是杳无人迹。但烟囱里升腾起袅袅青烟，屋前的小花园围着篱笆，土壤刚刚松过，打理得十分整洁。门合着。

Now she was here she felt a little shy of the man, with his curious far-seeing eyes. She did not like bringing him orders, and felt like going away again. She knocked softly, no one came. She knocked again, but still not loudly. There was no answer. She peeped through the window, and saw the dark little room, with its almost sinister privacy, not wanting to be invaded.

站在那儿，想起那男人古怪而锐利的目光，康妮觉得脸上有些发烧。她不再想给他捎什么口信，甚至打起退堂鼓来。她轻叩屋门，没人回应。再敲几下，但依然不够响。仍旧无人应门。她透过窗户向内窥视，幽暗的小房间映入眼帘，里面陈列的私人物品几乎透出不祥之气，不容任何人侵犯。

She stood and listened, and it seemed to her she heard sounds from the back of the cottage. Having failed to make herself heard, her mettle was roused, she would not be defeated.

她站在原地，侧耳倾听，有声音似乎从农舍后面传来。那家伙居然没听到敲门声，康妮再次鼓起勇气，她不愿畏缩不前。

So she went round the side of the house. At the back of the cottage the land rose steeply, so the back yard was sunken, and enclosed by a low stone wall. She turned the corner of the house and stopped. In the little yard two paces beyond her, the man was washing himself, utterly unaware. He was naked to the hips, his velveteen breeches slipping down over his slender loins. And his white slim back was curved over a big bowl of soapy water, in which he ducked his head, shaking his head with a queer, quick little motion, lifting his slender white arms, and pressing the soapy water from his ears, quick, subtle as a weasel playing with water, and utterly alone. Connie backed away round the corner of the house, and hurried away to the wood. In spite of herself, she had had a shock. After all, merely a man washing himself, commonplace enough, Heaven knows!

于是，她迈步向屋后绕去。农舍后面的地势陡然升高，因此后院是凹进去的，被一道低矮的石墙围绕着。她绕过房角，停住脚步。玲珑小巧的院落中，距她两步远的地方，那男人正在沐浴，全然没有觉察她的到来。他上半身不着一缕，棉绒马裤滑落到纤细的腰间。他那白皙修长的脊背，弯向满是肥皂沫的大盆，头浸在水里，以一种奇怪的方式，迅速地小幅度摆动着。他抬起细白的双臂，挤出流进耳朵里的肥皂水，动作迅捷轻盈，如同戏水的鼬鼠，享受着透彻的孤单。康妮退到屋角，急匆匆地向树林走去。不知不觉，她心里大为震颤。其实，只是个男人在沐浴而已，实在不足为奇，天晓得她为何这么吃惊！

Yet in some curious way it was a visionary experience: it had hit her in the middle of the body. She saw the clumsy breeches slipping down over the pure, delicate, white loins, the bones showing a little, and the sense of aloneness, of a creature purely alone, overwhelmed her. Perfect, white, solitary nudity of a creature that lives alone, and inwardly alone. And beyond that, a certain beauty of a pure creature. Not the stuff of beauty, not even the body of beauty, but a lambency, the warm, white flame of a single life, revealing itself in contours that one might touch: a body!

然而奇怪的是，刚才的经历让她浮想联翩，身体中的某个部分被深深触动。她看到那条肥大的马裤向下滑落，耷拉在纯净优雅且白皙的腰际，胯骨隐约可见。那种属于孤单生灵的落寞感，彻底征服了她。那副完美无瑕，孤独寂寞的纯白胴体，属于那个独居且内心孑然的生命。除此之外，还有那纯洁生命的独特美感。那既非物质之美，又非身体之美，而是某种轻柔的光芒，孤单生命燃烧着的温暖白色火焰，显露出自己足可触碰的身体轮廓。

Connie had received the shock of vision in her womb, and she knew it; it lay inside her. But with her mind she was inclined to ridicule. A man washing himself in a back yard! No doubt with evil-smelling yellow soap! She was rather annoyed; why should she be made to stumble on these vulgar privacies? So she walked away from herself, but after a while she sat down on a stump. She was too confused to think. But in the coil of her confusion, she was determined to deliver her message to the fellow. She would not he balked. She must give him time to dress himself, but not time to go out. He was probably preparing to go out somewhere.

感官的冲击震撼着康妮的子宫，她心知肚明，这种感觉已经深刻肺腑。而在意识层面，她更想把这件事视为玩笑。在自家后院洗澡的男人！用的肯定还是臭气熏天的硫磺皂。她不禁有些恼火，为何自己偏偏碰上这档子不雅的私事？她逃离现场，好在没被发觉，可走了一会，就在一个树桩上坐下来。她心如乱麻，根本无从思考。但尽管心绪烦乱，她还是决定完成自己捎口信的任务。她不愿无功而返。她得留出工夫，让他穿好衣服，但时间又不能太长，以免他走掉。这家伙很像是正准备要出门。

So she sauntered slowly back, listening. As she came near, the cottage looked just the same. A dog barked, and she knocked at the door, her heart beating in spite of herself.

于是，她放缓脚步，往小屋走去，留意着四周的动静。当她再度走近时，并未发现小屋有任何变化。狗吠声响起，她敲敲门，心不禁砰砰乱跳。

She heard the man coming lightly downstairs. He opened the door quickly, and startled her. He looked uneasy himself, but instantly a laugh came on his face.

那男人下楼梯的声音传进耳朵，步伐甚是轻盈。他忽地打开门，吓了康妮一跳。他的表情也不太自然，但随即便露出笑颜。