第十八章（第5/10页）

“我不该碰你。”他说。

"No!" she said.

“不！”她说。

"Love me! Love me, and say you'll keep me. Say you'll keep me! Say you'll never let me go, to the world nor to anybody.” She crept close against him, clinging fast to his thin, strong naked body, the only home she had ever known.

“爱我吧！爱我，说你会把我留在身边。说你我将永不分离！说你绝不会让我离开，无论是回到外面的世界，或是投入他人怀抱。”她缓缓靠近他，紧紧依偎着他修长结实的裸体，那是世间她唯一知晓的栖身之所。

"Then I'll keep thee," he said. "If tha wants it, then I'll keep thee.” He held her round and fast.

“俺不会让恁离开。”他说。“要是恁愿意，俺就会永远留你在身边。”他紧紧拥抱着她。

"And say you're glad about the child," she repeated.

“说你很开心将成为父亲。”她反复说道。

"Kiss it! Kiss my womb and say you're glad it's there.” But that was more difficult for him.

“吻它！吻我的子宫，说你很高兴，只因它的存在。”但这让他有些勉为其难。

"I've a dread of puttin' children I' th' world," he said. "I've such a dread o' th' future for 'em.” "But you've put it into me. Be tender to it, and that will be its future already. Kiss it!” He quivered, because it was true. "Be tender to it, and that will be its future."—— At that moment he felt a sheer love for the woman. He kissed her belly and her mound of Venus, to kiss close to the womb and the foetus within the womb.

“俺很害怕，害怕让孩子降临在这世上。”他说。“俺为它的未来感到担忧。”“但你早已把种子播撒在我的体内。以款款柔情待它，它便会拥有美好的未来。吻它！”他全身战栗，因为她的话千真万确。“以款款柔情待它，它便会拥有美好的未来。”——那一瞬间，他感受到自己是何等深爱着眼前的女子。他亲吻着她的下腹和维纳斯之丘，亲吻着靠近她子宫的位置以及孕育其中的胎儿。

"Oh, you love me! You love me!" she said, in a little cry like one of her blind, inarticulate love cries.

“噢，你爱我！你爱我！”她轻声呼喊着，仿佛做爱时那种无法抑制、难以言表的呻吟。

And he went in to her softly, feeling the stream of tenderness flowing in release from his bowels to hers, the bowels of compassion kindled between them.

他轻柔地插入她的身体，感觉到柔情的细流在彼此心房间传递，两颗爱怜的心燃烧起来。

And he realized as he went into her that this was the thing he had to do, to come into tender touch, without losing his pride or his dignity or his integrity as a man. After all, if she had money and means, and he had none, he should be too proud and honourable to hold back his tenderness from her on that account. "I stand for the touch of bodily awareness between human beings," he said to himself, "and the touch of tenderness. And she is my mate. And it is a battle against the money, and the machine, and the insentient ideal monkeyishness of the world. And she will stand behind me there. Thank God I've got a woman! Thank God I've got a woman who is with me, and tender and aware of me. Thank God she's not a bully, nor a fool. Thank God she's a tender, aware woman.” And as his seed sprang in her, his soul sprang towards her too, in the creative act that is far more than procreative.

当他插进她的身体，他意识到这是自己理应完成的重任，以深情与她交缠，并保持自己身为男子汉的骄傲、尊严以及完整。毕竟，她有钱有势，而他两手空空，为保有自尊和傲气，他自然不会因此而压抑对她的柔情。“我接受人与人之间的肌肤之亲，”他自语道，“以及情感的交融。她是我的伴侣。这是场战斗，我们面对的敌人是金钱、机器以及这世界残酷无情的兽性。她会成为我坚强的后盾。感谢上帝，让我拥有这女子！感谢上帝，让我拥有她，这位支持我、爱我、理解我的好伴侣。感谢上帝，她心地良善，蕙质兰心。感谢上帝，她柔情似水，善解人意。”当他将精液喷洒在她的体内，在这种远远高于生殖行为的创造性过程中，他的灵魂也与她的相互交融。

She was quite determined now that there should be no parting between him and her. But the ways and means were still to settle.

现在，她已铁了心，跟他永不离分。但采取怎样的方法还需考量。

"Did you hate Bertha Coutts?" she asked him.

“你恨贝莎·库茨吗？”她问他。

"Don't talk to me about her.” "Yes! You must let me. Because once you liked her. And once you were as intimate with her as you are with me. So you have to tell me. Isn't it rather terrible, when you've been intimate with her, to hate her so? Why is it?” "I don't know. She sort of kept her will ready against me, always, always: her ghastly female will: her freedom! A woman's ghastly freedom that ends in the most beastly bullying! Oh, she always kept her freedom against me, like vitriol in my face.” "But she's not free of you even now. Does she still love you?” "No, no! If she's not free of me, it's because she's got that mad rage, she must try to bully me.” "But she must have loved you." "No! Well, in specks she did. She was drawn to me. And I think even that she hated. She loved me in moments. But she always took it back, and started bullying. Her deepest desire was to bully me, and there was no altering her. Her will was wrong, from the first." "But perhaps she felt you didn't really love her, and she wanted to make you.” "My God, it was bloody making." "But you didn't really love her, did you? You did her that wrong.” "How could I? I began to. I began to love her. But somehow, she always ripped me up. No, don't let's talk of it. It was a doom, that was. And she was a doomed woman. This last time, I'd have shot her like I shoot a stoat, if I'd but been allowed: a raving, doomed thing in the shape of a woman! If only I could have shot her, and ended the whole misery! It ought to be allowed. When a woman gets absolutely possessed by her own will, her own will set against everything, then it's fearful, and she should be shot at last.” "And shouldn't men be shot at last, if they get possessed by their own will?” "Ay!—the same! But I must get free of her, or she'll be at me again. I wanted to tell you. I must get a divorce if I possibly can. So we must be careful. We mustn't really be seen together, you and I. I never, never could stand it if she came down on me and you.” Connie pondered this.